Once Upon a Host Club
by Usachan cake
Summary: Filled with one-shots (some may be more than 1 chapter long) about Haruhi and the other hosts inside different fairy tales that you can suggest, but putting their own spin on things like the hosts always do. Full summary inside. Please review!
1. Cinderella

**This is my fourth in-progress OHSHC fanfic. I have a feeling I'm biting off more than I can chew. Anyways, this story is basically all one-shots, some may be two or three chapters long depending on how descriptive I get.**

**Full summary: Haruhi Fujiyoka is new to the school of Ouran. She has no idea that she's jumping into a world of fairy tales and wonder. What happens when she becomes the center of attention when she just wanted a quiet place to study?**

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**Chapter 1**

"Once upon a time there were-"

"What the hell are you doing, senpai?" Haruhi asked.

"I'm narrating," Tamaki replied. "Might I please ask that you keep your swearing to a minimal?"

"Damn rich bastards, bossing me around..." Haruhi mumbled.

"I heard that!"

"What are you narrating, anyways, senpai?"

"Call me 'Narrator', not 'senpai', please."

"What are you narrating, _Narrator _Asshole?"

"That wasn't nice! Waah, MOMMY! Cinderella is in her rebellious stage!" And with that, Tamaki was gone.

"Cinderella..?" Haruhi looked down and found that her clothes had been ripped and now were covered in dirt.

"CINDERELLA!" someone yelled.

"Yes?" Haruhi played along.

"Get down here and CLEAN!" Haruhi noticed she was in a small attic-sized room with a bed, a mirror, and a dresser.

"Alright, mother," she replied. She didn't mean to add the mother part; the voice sounded vaguely familiar, but not like any woman's. She trudged down the stairs to find Kyoya, Hikaru and Kaoru standing at the bottom.

"I want your stepsisters' rooms to be SPOTLESS!" Kyoya yelled. He was even scarier when he raised his voice, Haruhi thought.

"I thought they were boys," Haruhi said shakily.

"They are obviously GIRLS, you worthless runt! Now get to work! I'm not paying you to slack off!"

"If I'm correct, you're not paying me at all..."

"WHATEVER! Just go clean before I don't feed you for a month."

"I think that's illegal," Haruhi muttered as she walked away. "Torture...how did I get stuck HERE?" Haruhi pulled a bucket out of a closet and put some soap in. She poured some water in and got down on her hands and knees with a rag, scrubbing the floor's surface spotless.

"Cin-chan!" a little mouse squeaked. "We can help you get to the ball!"

"So we're already that far in the plot?" Haruhi questioned.

"We're skipping around. I'm Hunny, and this is Mori," Hunny gestured to the slim, black mouse. He however was golden blonde and had tiny cake crumbs on his snout. "Here! We gathered these," Hunny handed the girl some beads. "Use them to sew your dress!"

"Alright, thanks."

With that, the mice were off. Haruhi heard trumpets sound from outside the castle doors, then muffled talking and a screech of delight. "GIRLS! COME IN HERE!"

The twins ran past Haruhi, knocking over the bucket on their way. They laughed as she picked it up, soaking up the water with a towel. She then hid around the corner and listened to her stepmother talk about the ball later that evening.

Throughout the day Mori and Hunny collecting various items from the stepsisters' rooms to use for her dress. By eight that evening her dress was made and she made her way into the main hall. Her stepsisters were wearing rather ugly feathery dresses that made them look like geese to an ugly duckling mother in too much makeup. "What do you think you're doing?" Stepmother asked Haruhi.

"Going to the ball. Have you ever seen this movie?" Haruhi asked.

"CUT!"

"Renge?" Haruhi asked.

"NO! You have this all wrong! Cinderella is supposed to be cleaning at this time, and the stepsisters should be tearing her dress apart! ACTION!"

"Huh?"

"Hey, we get to see more of our toy," the twins said in unison.

"UGH! YOU PERVS!" Haruhi shrieked as they tore away at her dress.

"Don't worry, Haruhi," Kaoru whispered in her ear, "we're doing this Disney movie style."

So, after about a half hour of yanking at Haruhi's dress, somehow the destructive sisters only managed to yank off a row of beads, some white buttons, a pink bow, and tore her skirt just a little. "Let's go, mummy," the twins said in unison. They waltzed out the front door.

Haruhi ran to around the huge house, looking for a way off the set. She stumbled upon a garden and sat down on a bench, breathing heavily from running. "Don't cry, Cinderella!" said a voice.

"Um, I wasn't-"

"Don't deny it! Go with the story! I'm the fairy godmother, Ranka!" Suddenly Haruhi's dad appeared wearing an overly large grey hooded coat. "I'm here to grant your wishes!"

"Great! I'd like off the set of this movie," Haruhi whined.

"Oh, it's not a movie!" Ranka chuckled. "You can't leave until we've finished filming. We have a contract," Ranka whispered. "How about we give you a new dress? Now what were those words..."

"CUT!"

"Renge! What?!" Ranka screeched. "I was in the zone!"

"Yes, good job. Cinderella, we need to see _more _from you. You're bland and boring. Come on, show me some real action! From the top! ACTION!"

"I'm your fairy-"

"I MEANT from the top of the line, fairy godmother! Pull yourself together! ACTION!"

"Now what were those words? Bloobity blippity? Um, brandy brawndy? Chucky chicky?"

"Do you mean 'bibbity bobbity boo'?" Haruhi asked.

"Why yes child! Did you learn that from me?" Ranka gushed.

"No, not really. I've seen the movies dad-I mean, fairy godmother."

"What are you still here for? We need to get you a dress and a pumpkin carriage!"

"I don't like pumpkins."

"CUT! CINDERELLA...um, what's your last name?"

"I don't know. You never find out, really."

"CINDERELLA! You are horrible for the part! Shape up or you're fired!"

"I'm fired, am I?" Haruhi said sneakily. _Operation: Get Fired shall commence._

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**If you have any suggestions for a fairy tale you'd like me to do, please post it in either the reviews or send me a PM! Thanks! Hope you enjoyed ;) This is part 1 of the 3-part Cinderella movie.**


	2. Cinderella: Part 2

**Sorry it's been a little bit since my update...I've been busy trying to balance creating a new account and writing chapters for four other fanfics. Anyways...yeah. LET ME CONTINUE!**

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**Chapter 2**

Soon after Renge yelled at Haruhi (Cinderella) for not working hard enough and threatening to fire her, Haruhi brainstormed in the pumpkin carriage. It was too bumpy, though, and she couldn't think straight. Suddenly there was a jolt and horse Mori and conductor Hunny helped Haruhi to the castle. "No! I don't-want to-go!" she said while being forced up the steps. After the doors were opened and she was successfully shoved in by Hunny, they quickly shut the doors and music played.

After the usual hallaballoo, the prince announced he was looking for a fair maiden. Haruhi looked up at the man sitting on the throne and muttered, "Tamaki?"

Hikaru and Kaoru were busy bowing and strutting their stuff in front of Tamaki, who looked at it like it was a plate of commoners' sushi. He stood, the twins looked hopeful, and he shoved them aside. He was looking directly at Haruhi. "S-senpai," Haruhi muttered as Tamaki grabbed her hand and waist.

"Shh, Haruhi," Tamaki said, recognizing her by her name. "This is all just an act. Don't worry. It means nothing, it's just for the movie." Haruhi relaxed a bit. She set her head on Tamaki's chest and listened to his surprisingly steady and slow heartbeat.

"CUT!"

"Renge, what the hell?!" Tamaki screeched.

"CINDERELLA!" Haruhi looked up, not caring what she did wrong but hoping it would get her fired. "Great job," Renge gave her a thumbs-up. She sighed. "Keep it up or you're fired."

Tamaki looked down at Haruhi. "What did you do to upset her so much into threatening to fire you?" he muttered.

"The usual. You people dragged me into this and I was reluctant. Can we dance again?" Haruhi smiled at Tamaki.

"Of course, princess," he smiled back.

"One more thing, senpai."

"What's that?"

"Use one of your shitty pick-up lines on me and I _will _punch you."

**THE END (of Cinderella)**


	3. Important Message!

**Attention to all my fans! I have decided to take some time and put more thought into my stories, so I will be rewriting ALL OF THEM on my new account, BluMoonKittyKitty. It may be a while before I re-post them, so please be patient. ;) I'd also ask that if you have questions, comments, wanna hit me upside the head with a chainsaw that you PM me on my new account. Thank you so much!**

**This is most likely the last you'll see of Usachan Cake. :'( aww, don't cry...please...don't...not for me...**


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